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On Saturday I turn 30.

I think in my more youthful years I saw 30 differently, and now that I am here I see it as an opportunity.  An opportunity to be more comfortable in my own skin.  To release anything dramatic.  To pick up things that feed my soul.  To learn to take care of myself holistically – spirit, body and mind.  To learn that happiness can be about contentment, and not necessarily overflowing joy.  To stop spreading myself so thin and do things on my terms.  To discover my own personal style in home and clothing and life, and be proud of it.  To just be present instead of always trying to impress people.

By no means do I consider myself wise, but I do think in the past 30 years I have gained perspective, and I am so grateful for the life I have been given.  This was a big decade for me!  The amount that happens in a 10 year span is unimaginable.   I moved to California in my 20s, found the love of my life and married him, bought a home, traveled to Europe twice, Africa and Asia, welcomed my first niece, got a dog, graduated college, landed my first real job (and second and third), made countless friends and went on incredible adventures.  I honestly could go on and on.  I became a part of a new family.  So many prayers were answered for me.  I learned to love and suffered great losses.  I think 10 years ago I could not imagine what my life would be now.  I still find myself feeling like it is all such  a surreal experience living the life that I do with all that it entails.  I kind of can’t believe I am married and own a home and am turning 30… When did all that happen?

I think this birthday, more than any New Year’s Resolution, has caused me to take a hard look at my life and ask me where I am, where I want to be, where I am headed and what I want to change.  I am excited and nervous and anxious.  I know some things will be harder than others to change, but I believe with this step comes growth and legacy potential. 

To each of you that love and encourage me, thank you.   Cheers to 30 years of life, and a whole lot more to go. 

And to my twin, who takes this day on with me, may we be closer every year that goes on and may we keep true to who we are and love the Lord and our families more each day.  I am so glad God chose you to go on this journey of being twins with me, and I am so thankful for everything you are and all you have taught me in this life.  I look up to you in so many ways and pray for you constantly to find your happiness, whether it is in joy or contentment.  Your selflessness astounds me, and your simple take on life inspires me.  Thank you for loving me through our tougher years when I was not as deserving of grace, and thank you for always seeking me out even when I make that difficult.  

I love you so much.  

Happy 30th birthday Christian.

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